Is mediocre sex still good sex?

Some say that even mediocre sex is  still good sex, but is this really true, especially for someone who has had a lot of good and bad sex?

We’ve all had to settle for a poor sexual performance at one time or another.  Sometimes it’s related to anxiety, alcohol, drugs, or even stupidity. Whatever the reason, when sex goes bad, sometimes it’s really, really bad—the kind of bad that makes you wish you had stayed home to watch porn.

Sex is meant to be fun and exciting; not weird, awkward, or disappointing.  Recently Soccer Dad and I were out with a couple on a second date.  Our first encounter with them was hot and heavy.  We couldn’t wait to top that night at the swingers club.  This time we met at their house. We walked into their dimly lit bedroom filled with dirty clothes.  While some may not notice the mess, I found this a bit tacky and inconsiderate.

But like the swinger troopers we are, Soccer Dad and I pressed on as our hormones were already raging with desire.  All four of us climbed on their king size bed where we began kissing, removing clothes, and rediscovering that spark.  It wasn’t long before John was instructing us to rub his wife up and down. Both Soccer Dad and I obliged his request, but we were perplexed. While we’re Esctasy virgins, both John and his wife had taken a hit to increase their pleasure without considering how this would affect Soccer Dad’s and my evening. After a lot of rubbing and moaning and some rather lame play, the night ended with only minimal real sexual interaction.  While they may have been happy with just a massage, Soccer Dad and I had not come over to give half hour back rubs.

Drugs and alcohol are just a few factors that can make for a lame sexual encounter.  Sometimes that initial spark with another couple wanes rather quickly when everyone undresses.  Soccer Dad and I met another couple recently in a bar. The conversation went easily and the suggestion of jumping into bed with these virtual strangers seemed exhilarating. As I lay on the bed being serviced by Jenny’s husband, I found myself listening to her rhythmic moans.  I alternated watching the sexual display between my own legs and hers.  I studied how her eyes were closed and her hands slowly rubbed herself, my husband, and me. While she was entranced in pleasure, I was in a different world next to her.   I looked around the room at the ceiling fan twirling above and the mirror on the wall beside me.  I played with my nipples and momentarily considered how great my breasts looked at that angle.  While this entire scenario sounds sexy, even enticing, the truth is all these thoughts were swirling in my head because I was bored.  Jenny’s husband was going down on me with vigor. He was excited about the impending sex with me and had called me super sexy moments before. But somewhere between hello, disrobing, and that first kiss, something was lost.

Even in the light of budding desire, the quick demise of sexual excitement is an unfortunate risk for a swinger or any sexually active person who must depend on a stranger to fulfill her sexual needs. Is bad sex still good sex?  Not to me, not anymore.  Maybe I have gotten a bit disgruntled in regards to sex.

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